Friday 6 February 2015

Arrogance - The silent killer !!

An article inspired from the movie Shamitabh (2015) Film released starring actors Amitabh Bachchan, Dhanush and Akshara Haasan among many other brilliant actors / actresses. This movie is a must watch for its stupendous theme and dazzling performances.

In the real world an arrogant person can be spotted from a mile away as the one who gets their things done. Since they have the ability to influence the behavior of others by throwing their weight around so that the people are obliged to do what such people require to be done. Such people can be described as having 'better than rest' feeling. "... arrogance has nothing to do with greatness!” ― C. JoyBell C. To me 'arrogance' more than often disliked by people but involves 'firm conviction' which, of course, is the upside but I believe that one can hold on to one's views without projecting arrogance and at the same time show some respect for the views of others as well. It, however, does not mean that one has to agree with the other person's view point but there is a way to show disagreement without creating unpleasantness. For most people arrogance means making other people feel bad about themselves without appearing to value their opinion (not that you have to agree with them).  I think it's all in the way something is said.  In my humble opinion (trying not be arrogant) arrogance is not a good thing, but confidence and assertiveness are good, although they walk a fine line with arrogance. It's a matter of respect. To respect another person doesn't mean you agree with that person, but it does mean that at some point you acknowledge that in spite of your disagreements you recognize the other person as valid and worthy as a human being. Arrogant people cross some kind of invisible line and manage to convey that others are worth less if they do not see the rightness of the arrogant person.

Arrogance is usually treated as a negative trait. It is the words of an arrogant person that tears the heart as an arrow cutting through the apple kept on the head of the target. Although arrogance is bad. But often you will be called arrogant, when you are not. Being right, and assertive in your beliefs is a good thing. People who feel bad about themselves will call that arrogant. I would not call you arrogant at all. There is a big difference between self assured and bullying someone with your convictions. Often people are called arrogant because they lack manners. They aren't really arrogant, they just don't know how to talk with other human beings as they lack of social skills and are perceived as arrogant. Sometimes we show arrogance to mask our self respect. Otherwise the purest of intention for our action is taken for granted. It is the way world works these days but what you sow is what you reap. Even if in the shadow of arrogance a wrong deed is done the outcome will be not free of repercussion. We may inculcate to control our desire for arrogant behavior to not lose the mind in guilt for the repercussions of a wrong deed. This is the the deeper meaning of the movie. As a best friend of mine gave a very inspiring poster which says "First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight with you, then you win" so should be our attitude towards arrogant people.

Monday 26 January 2015

A Life of Parallel Roads

A Life of Parallel Roads

All parallel roads lead to different destinations. They remain adjacent to each other but never meet. They take us to the destinations they are meant to lead. In life we are all traveling on a road alone. The important thing is to take the road we are most comfortable on as it will make the journey less tiresome. This doesn't happen although several difficult decisions come by but the strength to overcome adversities during our journey is derived from God. As God has intended us to believe in him for taking that road. 

Isaiah 40:31 "but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." So walk on the path chosen by God as he has placed great things to be achieved by you. 

As the saying goes "The grass is greener on the other side" so we often think what would happen if we were going on the other parallel road. It is only possible when we give time on the road we are traveling upon to justify its feasibility. From a distance they all resemble the same but only when once traveling through a particular one would come to know of that one’s importance. We search for another road, a different road, perhaps a better road somewhere else. But we have got to understand that the only way to find that perfect road is to walk down the road we are on and stay on it until the goal is reached.

Of course not all roads we take lead us to our desired destinations because we don't know where the road leads us. But we can only desire it to reach us to our goals in life. This perhaps coins a phrase "the acceptance of reality"— a cornerstone of contentment for traveling the road we are on and peace of mind that it will lead to our ambitions in life.

As Buddha once said that the way to happiness is actually quite simple; the secret is to learn to want what you have and not want what you don't have. In other words, to create an authentic sense of fulfillment on the road we are traveling upon, we have to learn how to want what we already have because it is not going anywhere. But what we don't have is anyway not ours. The paradigm being as Jesus says, in Luke 17:21, "The kingdom of God is within you." In learning to want what you have if you already possess the kingdom of God, it's pretty silly to spend your life piling up even more wealth, status, or romantic love, in the hope that it will bring you satisfaction as illustrated by Timothy Miller.

Every road we have traveled through has taught us something and continue to teach us. “People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost." Dalai Lama XIV. Ram Dass, summarizing essential Hindu teachings, advises, "Be here now." What you want and fear is in the future. What you regret is in the past. What you have is right here, right now. As Robert Fulghum puts it "The grass is not, in fact, always greener on the other side of the fence. No, not at all. Fences have nothing to do with it. The grass is greenest where it is watered. When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you are." If we can accept reality for what it is, we have the chance to develop it, to improve it, and to grow it. The road we are on will lead to our desired destination and fulfill all our ambition in life through the blessings of God.

Saturday 24 January 2015

"When sorrows come, they come not single spies But in battalions" From Shakespeare's Hamlet, 1602

As the expression goes by "When sorrows come, they come not single spies, but in battalions" so are troubles which always seem to come in groups, never just one alone. It means that when sad times come, sorrows, it seems they never come just individually. A lot of troubles seem to come at the same time, not just one at a time. When something sad happens in our life, it usually doesn't come alone - we normally find that lots of sad events come at the same time. (A bit like buses - you wait ages for one and then three come along in quick succession!). When bad things happen, they don’t come one at a time, like enemy spies, but all at once like an army. People are confused since the thought comes about why such incidents have to happen and feel victimized. However, one needs to work on each trouble one at a time rather than handling all at once. Troubles inadvertently are a bunch of sorrows its like they say, bad things come in threes. And I think sorrow comes in many ways. Small disappointments throughout the day and huge blindsiding catastrophes that strike us suddenly. I find comfort, though, that Shakespeare recognized sorrow as it is, named it, and we hundreds of years later can still relate.

Shakespeare's quote simply is observing that sorrows tend to be experienced at the same time as other sorrow, or during a period which, in retrospect, seems to be inclusive of other sorrows. I believe One legitimate sorrowful experience can create a mind-state which precipitates the recognition of other occurrences as being similarly sorrowful. If objectified by the observer, these later occurrences would not likely be identified with in the same way, as evidenced by the usual remembrance of only the first genuinely sorrowful occurrence.


My feeling is that there is nothing in life but refraining from hurting others and comforting those who are sad... as they are feeling left alone and lonely which is tough as it is, but still exist ... As they say that when trouble comes you should close ranks, meaning, to get closer to each other, to help or protect each other, to stand together. Life should be made pleasant ...